My mom said something I 100% agree with: Don't you wish you could freeze time after the baby is born until after you're recovered so you can really enjoy him?

Absolutely.

I feel like just when I start feeling really good, something happens and I feel bad again. Last week I walked around and was too active. I paid for it by being in lots of pain again and having to rest for a few days. This weekend I started feeling great again and then I got mastitis. The worst thing about it is that not only does my breast hurt like crazy (and nursing kills!), my whole body is super achy and sore, and I have a low grade fever and chills. It's pretty awful. It started Thursday night and I called the doctor Friday. I started an antibiotic and I've taken some tylenol, so I'm feeling better but still hurting. I guess it's not surprising that I'm still not fully recovered, my body is working overtime to now rid an infection, make milk to feed a baby, and recover from having a baby...all with only 2 1/2 hour increments of sleep every day and night.

On a brighter note, I am SO completely in love with Blake! He just gets more sweet and adorable every day. I absolutely love nursing him too!! I'm a little surprised at that because I was wary of it at first. But it's really a cool thing that I'm the only one that can feed him. It's also such a sweet bonding time. I think my neck is going to be permanently curved down from always looking at him while I hold him and nurse him. I seriously love it. He is such a good baby too! Sometimes when he cries I get frustrated, but then I realize that he hardly ever cries compared to some babies. And even though he has gas, which is getting better, he doesn't cry like colic so that's awesome. Plus he's a great sleeper and he seems to eat pretty well too. Sometimes I just want to hold him and play with him for a long time while he's awake, but he gets overtired and has to take naps or else he gets really cranky. I feel like I'm kind of figuring it out and doing a pretty decent job.

And I have the best husband. He is so sweet and so wonderful. He absolutely loves Blake and takes such good care of him too! Sometimes I do freak out for a mili-second when they play, but then I remember he's a dad, and dads are much more daring than moms (and he would never ever do anything to hurt Blake). :-) And he takes such good care of me. I seriously love that man. I feel so incredibly blessed!!!

celebration!

So even though it might change again very soon, I have to take a moment to celebrate our night last night. I fed Blake at 7:30 after we gave him a bath. He slept like a rock in his car seat while we watched the BYU basketball game at our friend's house. He didn't even peep, even when it got REALLY loud. Then he woke up and ate around 11:30 pm when we got home. He slept til 3:30 am. Then went right back to sleep after eating (yay!). Then he slept until 8:00. I was pretty darn excited, not gonna lie! It was pretty nice to feel like I was actually getting some sleep.

We figured out he likes sleeping in his bouncy chair alot more than his crib. It's more cozy and snuggly and propped up so it helps his digestive system not back up. We also started giving him some gas drops, so hopefully that will help him be more comfortable.

He is so snuggly and so cute and we love him SO much!! I think he's starting to get closer to 9 pounds because he is tons heavier when I'm holding him to nurse. I think that's a good thing he's growing.

Oh, and last night I had a wonderful embarrassing moment. I was walking down the stairs at our friend's, and I slipped and crashed and slid halfway down the stairs. In front of a bunch of people. It hurt. And was embarrassing.

fun realizations

Last night Scott brought home a big box of diapers for Blake. I thought it was pretty huge and we might not make it through before he grows out of them.

Then I realized that there were only 84 diapers in the box.

And then I realized it would probably take us only 8 days to go through the box.

$20 well spent, right? :-)

Just when you think you know...

Just when you think you know, you have no idea.

That's a little how I feel!!

Remember the post I JUST wrote about how Blake was getting on a good schedule? Yeah, things can change fast. I feel like last night and today (so far) he's totally not on the schedule. I think part of it is due to the fact that he hasn't been getting good naps during the day. It's just so fun to play with him that we keep him up and awake when really he should be sleeping. So I think he's over tired. Which I should've realized last night BEFORE I woke him up to eat after he'd been sleeping for almost 6 hours straight...oops. And he ate a ton before bed, so I'm sure he was fine. But I woke him up and fed him and proceeded to remain awake for almost 2 hours after that because he didn't want to sleep.

Oh yeah, and babies get gas. It's not very fun. It's a recent development this week. He seems alot more cranky and fussy and I'm pretty sure it's due to gas pain. Especially because Scott can "gas him" (push his legs into is chest, expelling bubbles from the tummy), and then he's happier. I'm not very good at it yet. Oh, and remember how the first week we had him we realized he liked his hands up out of the swaddle? Yeah that changed. They have to be down now or he'll break his way out and get mad.

Oh and remember how I hate off-brand newborn diapers? Just get the pampers swaddlers or huggies. It makes for a happier mom and dad.

Oh and remember how everyone told me to take it easy and really relax and rest for a few weeks? Yeah, I didn't realize that I would suddenly feel great after a couple days, want to get out, go grocery shopping, visit a friend, walk around etc, and then suddenly feel like I had digressed back to 4 days postpartum. I over-did it and spent 2 days (and counting) on the couch. It really is true that you have to take it easy no matter how you feel.

It has been so nice to have my mom and then Scott's mom here to help out these past couple weeks. But, I must admit, I am very excited to get into our own groove, our own schedule and our own routine. I think it'll make for a happier family when we all have a routine to follow.

Oh yeah, and remember how I lost 25 pounds in a week? Well, I haven't lost any since. I guess the "real baby weight" falls off quick. Now I gotta work on the "pregnant during the holidays" "have an extra cookie" "those brownies are delicious" "I need some chocolate" weight.

The past (first) 2 weeks

It's been a week since I updated. I think that's the longest it's been in awhile! Forgive me, I've been a little preoccupied... :-)

I cannot believe Blake is 2 weeks already! 2 weeks and a day to be exact. Time has absolutely flown by!

The first week was really tough. Blake really had a hard time eating. He didn't want to suck and he just wouldn't latch on or eat at all. It was really disconcerting. I really struggled alot and was really worried. Especially when we went to the doctor and he had lost 11 oz since birth. So I started pumping and giving him a couple bottles to help get him food. Also, the lactation specialist at the hospital didn't spend much time with me trying to get him to latch on. I thought it was a problem with myself, having flat squatty nipples. The last day we were there we couldn't get him to latch so she just handed me a nipple shield and got him to latch on that enough that she left and let us go home. So then we got home and I couldn't get him to eat or latch or anything. He started getting the hang of sucking by taking a bottle. So that was good.

I had no idea how hard it would be and how real the "baby blues" were until we got home. I'd read about it and heard a little, but nobody told me what it would really be like. I have never felt so out of control of my body and emotions. It seemed like everything made me cry, good or bad. I felt so inadequate and incapable of taking care of a newborn. I felt so cooped up and tied down like I would never get out of the apartment, never see other people again, never be able to go anywhere, never have my life back, never feel like I got enough sleep, etc. I felt like my life was suddenly ONLY feed him, change diaper, put to sleep, repeat. With not enough time in the middle for me to accomplish anything or take a nap. A couple times I just started bawling my eyes out and when Scott asked what was wrong I wouldn't have any idea. I really really struggled and really started getting worried that I might get postpartum depression.

Thankfully, after only a few days of this, Blake decided to latch on really well to the shield and starting eating alot more. And faster too! Before it took him at least an hour, sometimes longer, to eat. Scott and I went and visited some friends and went to the store. I opened up the blinds and let some sun in the apartment. Things started getting better! I also realized that the more people I talked to about the problems I was having nursing, the more people I found that had experienced my same problem! I realized I was not alone. I also realized (after lots of positive affirmation from Scott), that it was OKAY to pump bottles for him to eat. He would still be getting breastmilk and that's what really matters. (Funny how all this happened because when I was pregnant, I was weirded out by nursing and apprehensive of it) I felt like I wasn't a good enough mom if I gave him bottles. Tons of people seem to be against that so I felt like it wasn't okay. But then we decided that the ultimate goal was to get food into him and if a bottle was the only way, then so be it.

But now things are tons better! Blake eats like crazy now. We still have to use the shield. It's a hassle and annoying for me, but he is getting enough food and he nurses well with it, so I'm okay with that. I definitely want him off of it, but I think it'll take a little time and work. We're also on what I feel like is a really good schedule! After talking to some friends and reading Baby Wise, we have pretty much gotten ourselves on that type of schedule. And I feel like it happened without trying too hard. He eats consistently every 3 hours. And he only takes about 30 minutes or so to eat! After eating, he spends time being awake and we play with him or hold him. Then we put him down for a little nap for an hour or so. Then he wakes up and repeats. This happens throughout the whole day. Then at night, I feed him about 9pm, put him straight to bed and he doesn't wake up til around 12. Then I repeat the same thing for night. Feed and put straight back to bed. Sometimes he'll lay in his bed with his eyes wide open, but I don't talk to him or play or anything. I just turn off the light and go to bed. He eventually falls asleep on his own. It's been great! I can't believe how consistent he is too. It's been so fantastic because I know exactly when he needs to eat so I can plan my day around feeding times. Also, he is great about just staying awake and not fussing so I know I can do things during that time too. It's so wonderful. I've also realized that I MUST get at least 7-8 hours of sleep to feel emotionally stable for the day. To accomplish this, I just go to bed as soon as he's down after the 9pm feeding. Then I have a 10 hour time block until about 7:30 or so to sleep. Subtract his feeding times and I get sufficient rest to be awake for the day after his 7 something feeding.

Now for the not so good part. I felt fantastic only a few days after having him, and I was cooped up and wanted to get out, so we got out. We've pretty much been out every day doing something for the past week. I think I did those things too soon. I've started feeling sore again and not so great. So I need to take it easy for a few days again. It's so true to not do too much before your body is ready! And even though you might feel great, it doesn't mean your body is ready! I keep forgetting I just had a baby. I'm pretty sure that's quite traumatic for the area he came out of, so it makes sense that I would need more than a week to recover. Silly me.

Overall though things are going great. It is so nice to feel like Blake is on a schedule and eating consistently. It's also been so great to have my mom here for a week, and then Scott's mom here for a few days. I can't believe how much Blake has grown already! At his 1 week check up he had gained back 12 oz! So almost a week ago he weighed 7 lbs 9 oz. The doc said they like to see 2/3-1 oz weight gain per day. In 7 days he gained 12 oz, so almost double. Which is so great! He's eating like a champ and dirtying/wetting tons of diapers. He is a really sweet, good baby. He doesn't really fuss or cry unless he needs food or to be burped. I think he doesn't like something I'm eating though, maybe chocolate. He seems to have some gas that is making him uncomfortable. He smiles all the time (randomly), lifts his head up when he's laying on our chest and he rolls over to the side when he's laid down flat on the ground. He gets more cute every day! His eyes are huge and beautiful, his skin is still amazing color and his hair is starting to lighten a bit. He's still under 8 pounds so he's a little guy, but I love it that way. He's super snuggly and absolutely loves to nap curled up on my chest. I love it too. When he's awake he is super alert and looks around at everything. He's so curious and likes to stare at faces and things. He is a super kicker and will probably be a soccer player. We absolutely LOVE him!!!

And now, on a funny side note... I'm sitting on our bed writing while Scott folds our clean laundry. I have this problem with taking my clothes off inside out. So as he's folding, he's giving me gold, silver or bronze stars for the clothes I have that are not inside out. If I get 3 silver stars, it's equal to a gold. 9 bronze to get a gold. 3 bronze to get a silver. It's pretty hilarious. He's at 100% and with the white load, I failed and only got 30%. It's really funny :-)

Oh, and it was pretty cool because we got a huge snow storm this week (by huge I mean 5 inches of snow). Logan cancelled classes on Thursday, and then had a snow schedule Friday and cancelled the Tri 2 labs, so Scott didn't have school either day! It's been great to have him home.

I can't think of anything else to write right now. I'm sure I'll think of more later, but this seems to be a long enough post. And even though it's posted by Scott, he didn't write it.

Pre and post pregnancy

Things I miss about being pregnant:

-Feeling my baby kick inside my tummy

-Scott rubbing and talking to my tummy

-Having people comment and ask when my baby is due

-Getting compliments about a cute baby bump

-The 2nd Trimester ;-)

-My nails growing at an astronomically fast pace

-Feeling baby hiccups

Things I don't miss about being pregnant:

-Sweating buckets and being hot all the time

-Wearing the same outfits every day for the last month

-Having a belly get in the way of everything

-Feeling nauseous when I didn't eat

-Not being able to run, move well or work out hard core

-Peeing every hour

-Feeling huge and unattractive

-Acne

-Feeling like the baby was never going to come

Things I LOVE about being a mom:

-Holding, cuddling and snuggling Blake all the time

-Kissing Blake all over

-Nursing Blake

-Dressing him up in cute outfits

-Staring into his eyes

-Watching his funny expressions

-Looking at his cute face all day

-Changing diapers (it's not so bad yet)

-Obsessing about how cute Blake is

-Pondering how the heck he came out of me

-Having him hold my finger

-Pondering the miracle of life and how we were able to make such a beautiful child

-Losing weight quick from nursing

Things that are different with being a mom:

-Time is measured by feeding, sleeping and diaper changes

-Postpartum hormones

-Frustrations and struggles with learning how to nurse

-Lack of sleep

-

Man Date

This is my sweet boy.

He's an OG.

From St. Louis County.

Monday night Scott and Blake had their first man date.

They watched the National Championship BCS game. They were cheering for the Oregon Ducks. Blake moved or twitched sometimes when Auburn did something good that he didn't like.

This is what their date looked like.

Fun huh!

Now if only we could convince Blake that it's way more fun to be awake during the day and asleep at night... :-) We sure love this guy!

The Story

I started having contractions around 7:30 am on Thursday. They started getting pretty regular by 10, and by noon they were about 5 minutes apart and getting stronger. We were counting them wrong so we thought they were 3 minutes apart so we called the hospital and they said to come. When we got there we were sent to an evaluation room and I was only at a 1. So they hooked up a fetal monitor for 30 minutes or so and then had us walk around for an hour, then repeat. We got in that room around 1pm and we were there til around 5. It was pretty stressful for me. I didn't get along with the nurse very well and had a hard time communicating with her and was really anxious to leave. Our doc wanted to send us back home right away but she wanted to try and keep us. So they did. Around 5:00 I was at a 3 cm and they admitted us to labor and delivery. That room was so much better!! The contractions started getting MUCH more intense and painful and seemingly close together. Around 8:30 we decided to have them check me, see what had progressed and then maybe sit in a tub. Well, after all that I was still only a 3! So we talked and decided it was probably a good idea to get an epidural since I was in so much pain and had literally not progressed.

It turned out to be a really great decision.

They administered it just after 9 PM. By 11:00 I was still a 3, maybe 3.5. So they decided to break my water around midnight. They found it to be stained with meconium (baby pooped in it) and called the NICU to be ready and present for delivery. A couple hours later I was only at a 4. So they started me on pitocin. A couple hours later I was finally a 5. Another couple hours I was a 6. Then finally 7 cm after they were giving me the highest dose of pitocin and gave me a shot of valium cuz I started feeling sharp pain from the contractions through the epidural. Eventually around 8:30 or 9am on Friday morning the nurse said our doctor wanted blood work done in case we had to do a c-section. I was a little nervous. I hadn't eaten anything since noon the day before and I could only eat jello and apple juice (why not just give me a bucket of straight sugar? same thing, right?). I asked if the blood draw would make me nauseous and dizzy because I hadn't eaten. They said no because I was on an IV. Well, a minute after the blood nurse came in I said "I'm gonna throw up" and not more than 4 seconds later I did. So they waited to draw my blood. I think that jolted the baby and my body into action because I jumped from a 7 to 9 cm by 10 am. Soon after that check I started feeling new contraction feelings and felt like I wanted to push and that would help. So she checked me less than an hour later and said I was at a 10 and we could get ready to push.

Luckily, I had the sense to not push the epidural dose clicker (that gave more through the tube) when she checked me at 9 cm and when I started feeling the pushing contractions. My legs were completely numb from the valium and I couldn't move them, so I didn't want to click it. So, for the last 2 hours of labor, including an hour of pushing, the epidural was wearing off alot. Enough that I could feel the pushing contractions and know when to push and could feel the baby's head and feel him come out. Our doctor was super patient and worked with me and the baby's head so I didn't have to get an episiotomy. I only had a very small surface level tear.

Blake came out with the cord wrapped around his body and neck once so Scott didn't get to cut it. He also was kinda blue and not really moving when he came out. The NICU team grabbed him right away and started working on him right in the room. I was pretty nervous because he wasn't crying at all. It didn't take long for them to get air to him and for him to breathe. His oxygen levels were really low and they had to clear some gunk from his lungs and tummy. They said real quick that he was getting good color and making great progress. It was still really emotional and scary to watch. After they finished we got to spend about 30-40 minutes with him before they took him to the nursery for more observations and all that. We picked him up about an hour or so later and he was great!!

He was born 1/7/11 at 11:52 am, 7 lbs, 8 oz, 9 3/4 inches long, dark hair, dark eyes, good colored skin. He's gorgeous and SO sweet! We came home on Sunday afternoon. Things are going very well. He had a hard time eating at first, but now that we're home he's a champ. Our first night was really long, he was confused and thought it was day time. We'll see how he is tonight.

We sure love this guy and it is so fun being parents! I love watching Scott change diapers, clothes, swaddle and cuddle with him. He is the best dad ever. I'm feeling pretty good and moving pretty good. Feels a little like I got hit by a truck, but hey, I birthed a baby! Life is such a miracle and we feel so very blessed.

Introducing...

Blake Steven Dodds made his appearance into the world this morning at 11:52 am.

It was a very long, tough, and medicated labor, but we are very blessed that we did not have to have a c-section or episiotomy.

He's 7 lbs, 8 oz, and 19 3/4 inches long. Absolutely perfect and beautiful in every way! Pictures and the story to come.

For now? Cuddling, snuggling and resting.

Hmmm. Ow?

New Car seat

So we bought a car seat over a month ago. We thought it would be great and it was really inexpensive, so we thought it was a good idea. After we'd had it that long, I suddenly started thinking a couple days ago that I didn't like it. It seemed too small, squishy and an uncomfortable angle for the baby. It also fit terribly in our car! The latch system allowed about 3 inches of wiggle space on both sides, and only one of our 3 seat belts would get tight enough to hold it down, and it still didn't fit that great.

So, last night we decided to see what other options there was a Babies R Us. We had a coupon and some time. I wanted to original one we got because of the triangle handle. But then I realized that was something I could live without. We also realized at the store that it weighed 15 pounds compared to the new one we got which weighs 9 pounds. So, we found a sweet Chicco travel system we really liked, estimated the cost with our coupon and decided it was worth it to have something that we liked better, felt was safer, and fit in our car easier.

At the register we got another surprise. The first car seat we bought we used a $20 off coupon. When they exchanged it, they gave us the full price back. So, we actually got $80 off the new set vs. the $60 that we were thinking. So, it turned out to be what we thought was a great deal!

The funniest part is that this travel system was the original one we registered for (except in a different color), but decided not to get because it was expensive. However, with the coupons and the money we have been saving for the baby, we could afford it. So, YAY! We have a sweet new car seat and stroller.

Now the baby can officially come. Anytime. Really. Any day. Any second. in fact, now would be great! Seriously, baby, I'm not joking. :-)

Lessons Learned

I learned two things yesterday after a very disappointing doctor's appointment.

1. I have the most incredible husband. He is so sweet and loves me so much and will do anything to make me feel better and be happy. He totally took care of me last night and made me forget everything that was going on. Pizza, Dr. Pepper, a chick flick, Edy's ice cream and some football. It was perfect and very therapeutic.

2. I am not in control. Heavenly Father can see a much bigger picture than I can.

We had a wonderful and very spiritual experience of which I will not share because it was very personal for us. I am incredibly grateful for the power of the Priesthood in our home.

Here's to thoroughly enjoying the last few days together before Scott goes back to school!! :-)

Football

So I must admit, I really like TCU. I'm not sure why, I just like them alot. And I loved watching them play against Wisconsin last night. It was a great game! Definitely exciting up to the last minute...

Oklahoma on the other hand, not so exciting. Now that Sam Bradford left they're just not as much fun to watch play (helps that he is way more attractive than Landry Jones. And who names their child Landry? It looks like Laundry.). But at least they won. They should've completely killed UConn, but that didn't. I don't like their defense that much. Offense isn't spectacular either. I'm hoping this season they vamp it up again and actually live up to their name instead of being overrated again. But, of course, I was raised a Sooner fan, so I have to like them even when they lose and play crappy. (which is not as fun)

Now back to TCU. One of their guys was named Tank. We joked about who would name their kid Tank. But then, he swatted down a ball at the 3 yard line on a 2 point conversion attempt and won the game for his team. We decided Tank was a pretty sweet name for him. Also, Andy Dalton threw some amazing passes. It was just a really really good game!! I really like watching TCU. They're super fast and strong. Especially considering their defensive line averages 6'1" and 271 pounds while Wisconsin's offensive line averages 6'2" 321 pounds. TCU was definitely at the disadvantage size wise but they figured out how to tackle low and were able to take the bigger guys down. Great game. I'm glad we got to watch it. :-)

Our baby is not getting a car for his 16th birthday. That was Scott's deal to him if he came before last night. Hehe. I guess he didn't understand how good of a deal that would was. I like how my mom put it yesterday "maybe he is still downloading his "how to deal with life on earth" manual and you wouldn't want to interrupt that!" I'm crossing my fingers for something big to happen today and to have a baby by tomorrow. That was my first instinct guess, the 3rd, so we'll see.