Not "just" a Mom

Some people love Mother's Day. Some people hate it.
I'm not sure which category I fall into, but I wasn't looking forward to attending church yesterday.
Not because I don't love church, I do! Not because I don't love Mother's Day, I like it. But because I'm a week from my due date and I knew people would be thinking, wondering, and asking, when is the baby coming?
Normally it would be a little hard, being a week out, getting all those "how ya feeling? Anything changing?" questions. But this time it has been particularly hard. Probably because all the friends I know of who are/were pregnant and due within about 2 weeks before or after me, have all had their babies. Anywhere from 4 weeks to 10 days early.
Which makes me think, What's wrong with me?
When there is absolutely nothing wrong. In fact, I may be the more "normal" one.

Despite the mental preparedness I had to do before going to church, I knew I needed to be there, and boy am I glad I was.

In Sacrament Meeting, our dear Young Women President and all around amazing woman, gave the last talk. She shared a story that I thought was particularly applicable to so many women, in every stage of life.
She told of someone she knew that had a very high paying and glamorous job that left it to get married and have kids. One night, she, the friend, went to a dinner that was full of prestigious doctors, lawyers, and other various men and women with high paying and high status jobs. Their wives were there too. During the evening, each person got up and introduced themselves and said what they did. "I'm so and so and I'm a doctor. I'm a lawyer. I'm a TV host." etc etc. 
Then the women got up.
"I'm so and so and I'm just a mom..."
"I'm such and such, and I'm just a mom."
"I'm so and so, and I'm just a mom of six children."
On and on it went with the wives, each saying a variation of "I'm just a mom" with an almost regretful and apologetic tone.

Our speaker talked at length about how sad this is. How we as Mother's have a more noble and important responsibility and job than any other profession and how we should never, ever, say or think "I'm just a mom."

Later, in our Relief Society lesson, our teacher talked about liking ourselves. She mentioned how easy it is for us to look at our friends and others around us and compliment them on many things. But when it comes to complimenting and saluting ourselves, it's gut-wrenchingly difficult. It is hard to see the good in ourselves.

The combination of these two lessons really struck me to the core.

I am not just a mom. I am a Mother.
I need to stop negatively comparing myself to others for the things I lack and start seeing the good I have and am.

So for all of us mother's out there, you are not just a mom! You are a Mother! You are a co-creator of life partnered with God. You have divine guidance, inspiration, and intuition. Your job is so much more important and higher in status than the best doctor, lawyer, or multi-billionaire. Why? Because who raised those people? Mothers.

One of my favorite quotes I heard yesterday:

"Life doesn't come with a handbook. It comes with a Mother." 

Coupled with that is the need to see ourselves as Heavenly Father sees us. As a woman it is far too easy to compare, degrade, and diminish our own beauty, talents, and abilities. We think everyone else is better, prettier, skinnier, than ourselves. In reality, we need to recognize how truly amazing we are!

"Learn to see yourself as Heavenly Father sees you. As His precious daughter...with divine potential." 

(Dieter F. Uchtdorf)

Yesterday I struggled emotionally feeling like something was wrong with me because I didn't have a baby yet. I felt tired, uncomfortable, huge, unattractive, and impatient. I realized that I need to enjoy each moment of each day. Savor the "now" and relish in the fact that I have one more day to spend just with my husband and our first son. I have one more day to feel a baby moving inside of me. I have one more day to carry and nourish this baby so he can be born healthy and strong. I have one more day to not worry about feeding, changing, holding, and caring for a newborn. I have one more day to not be experiencing labor and recovery pain. I have one more day to sleep a little longer. I have one more day to be a partner in the creation of life. 

I am a Mother. I have always wanted to be one and now I always will. There is nothing in my life that has brought me greater satisfaction, challenge, frustration, happiness, sorrow, pain, and pure heavenly JOY than has being a mother. It is truly the most incredible gift and opportunity I could have ever hoped for. And you know what? I think I'm a pretty darn good Mom! Along with each and every one of you...whoever you are, reading this post.

So please, celebrate yourself and your beauty, talents, abilities, and strengths! Tell yourself what an amazing chef you are. Tell yourself how smart and intelligent you are. Tell yourself how loving, selfless, patient, and kind you are. Tell yourself what an incredible woman and Mother you are. Because it's true. You are not just a mom.

Boundaries, Bloody Noses, and Potty Training

We had quite the busy morning today! Full of all things completely unexpected and slightly unprepared for. However, I will return to that more after I get this off my chest....

Our ward boundaries we changed last week at Stake Conference. It's something that has been rumored to happen for at least the 2 1/2 years we've lived here. Our former ward, Parkway, was a very, very, small ward with some incredible families! We saw countless families move out during our time spent there with very few big move ins. Despite being in a small ward, we formed some amazing friendships and I've never, ever, ever, felt so welcome and loved in a ward. I knew I could call anyone for help and they'd be there in an instant. I never felt lost, alone, or friendless in our former Parkway ward.

Anyway, we knew change was bound to happen, and change came in a big way. The Stake (read: with permission from Salt Lake), basically squished former Parkway and Chesterfield ward boundaries, tossed in a few families from Rockwood and Frontenac, and then split everyone East and West, prior it was North and South, thus creating two completely new wards with new bishops, presidencies, callings, and members. They kept about 1/2 of each former ward in each new ward, so we still know tons of people in our new ward. I think it was the best way they could have split it!!

It was amazing to be in a huge ward on Sunday. The time it took to pass just the bread for Sacrament was equivalent to the time it took our former ward to complete the whole Sacrament service. There were people in the overflow and when we arrived 5 minutes early, it was a small struggle to find a seat. I haven't been in a ward that large in years. It was exciting and joyous but slightly overwhelming. I'm sad I'm not working in Young Women's anymore either, but hopefully I'll have another opportunity later in life. All in all, I think the changes are wonderful and will be amazing.

Now, back to our morning....
I've never been one to say that my child had to be potty trained at a certain age. I've always had the mindset that he'd be closer to 3 than 2 and that it would just happen when it was time. I was also planning on starting the process after the baby was born.
But, apparently I may be wrong.
At breakfast this morning, Bubs said "I pooted!" which usuallu means he went a little pee pee. Then he told me "I go potty on Mommy's toilet! You stay here, I be right back" and he ran to the bathroom. I followed him and he was removing clothing and saying "Pants off. Socks off. Diaper off." Then he climbed on the toilet. He didn't go, but we pulled out his little toilet and he spent the morning pantsless and sitting on it. He knew that he needed to poop and he wanted to go on the toilet.
While he was watching a show it happened. He came running into the bathroom where I was getting ready, yelling "I pooped! I pooped! Kaiya eating the poop!" and low and behold, he had pooped in his little toilet!!
I cleaned him up, we celebrated, danced, cleaned things up and he got some chocolate chips. He was ecstatic!!
He spent most of the next hour on, or near, his toilet trying to go again.
Then he was terribly upset at me for putting on a diaper and taking him to run errands. After we got back, he got distracted by toys and pooped in his diaper without saying anything (I was distracted on the phone too). So, does our potty training journey begin? I'm thinking so!

I've gotten some really awesome tips and advice from lots of friends who are moms. Thank you!! Hopefully I'll be able to utilize some of them. My goal is to let him potty train himself. I definitely want to make a big deal of it and celebrate when it happens, but I also don't want to nag him and force him to potty all the time. He is a smart kid and really good at communicating, so I think we'll be successful. I don't want to digress once we start, so I just want to take it slow and not force anything. He's really excited about chocolate chips,  the potty dance, new underwear, and sitting on the toilet, so I'm just going to go with the flow and see what happens!!

Last but not least, poor guy was so excited about putting on 3 pairs of new undies, plus one on his head as a hat, that he decided to run and get his real hat. On his way back in the kitchen he tripped and fell flat on his face. The result? His first bloody nose.

He was a trooper and was right back to normal after a quick screaming cry and a few snuggles. Then he decided to be sneaky and lock me inside his bedroom while he was on the outside. No, I didn't have a key. After a quick, urgent, trying not to panic, prayer, I managed to turn the knob hard enough in such a way that the latch slid out of the hole and the door opened. For once I'm glad we've had issues with our doors staying shut tight and hanging in the frame straight. Could've been tragic, for sure! At least I had my phone in case of a real emergency.... 

I'd love to hear your potty training stories! Successes, failures, frustrations, tricks, etc. Please share!

p.s. 30 weeks down, 10 to go. Wahoo!

Kansas City LDS Temple Dedication

Because of our recent "escape from life" road trip, I had the unique and wonderful opportunity to time our arrival back in Kansas City perfectly.

We were in town for the Kansas City LDS Temple Dedication.

I got to go.
It was so surreal.

Mom and I went to the 12:00 session on Sunday, May 6, 2012.
It was glorious.
Uplifting.
Magnificent.

Everything I needed to hear and feel at that point in my life.
There was so much emphasis on eternal marriage, families, covenants, temple attendance, and enduring trials.
All of it rang true deep in my heart.
Especially when Elder Holland was quoted as saying: "When I think of heaven, it wouldn't be heaven without my wife and children." 
His talk was my favorite. He spoke of trials, personal revelation, and the concept that faith will always prevail, as long as we endure, put our trust in God, and remember that He is there.
I hope to find a copy of that talk.

5 years ago I never imagined I would be able to attend an open house tour and dedication of a temple just 40 minutes away from home in the near future.
It fills my heart with joy when I think about the reality of the temple now.
I came away from the session with a renewed sense of hope, strength, and reminder of what is right.
I am thrilled at the prospect of attending that temple when I am in town.
For now, I need to remember the eternal importance of temple attendance and utilize the present blessing we have of a temple 15 minutes away.

source

I also just came across this beautiful and inspiring article about the Cultural Celebration the night before. Check it out. If anyone knows where I can find a video recording of the celebration so I can see it, please share!!

My 10 minutes of fame

I'm famous.

Well, in the Mormon realm of the world.

and by famous, I don't really mean famous.

Do you remember this amazing woman? Who gave this amazing talk at General Conference?

 Elaine S. Dalton

General President of Young Women

She's pretty spectacular.

Some people know, some people don't, but I was recently called to serve as the 1st counselor in our Young Women's presidency in our ward. That's a huge calling!

So I had an amazing opportunity to attend a training meeting for all the Young Women leaders in the area on Saturday. Sister Dalton was there directing the training. During the meeting she did an object lesson of sorts, using people as visual aids. She made a comment about how many of the YW leaders these days look young enough to be the girls, and then how she needed someone who looked young to come up and act as a young women.

We had happened to get there early so we were in the 2nd row.
And I'm young. Really young.
And I look young.

She looked straight at me and had me come up.

She put her arm around me and talked about how I was the young women and how I needed a strong support group. So she had other audience members call out people who could be a support: mom/dad, yw leaders, young men leaders, home teachers, bishop, sunday school teachers, seminary teachers, grandma/grandpa, etc. They all came up and formed a circle around me. Then Sister Dalton came into the circle, took me by the arm and led me out. She commented on how easy it was to pull me away from that group, and how even though a young woman can be surrounded by all these people, one big temptation can come in and take her away.

So she had the people link arms around me and then she tried to get in. She said when they were all working together and trying hard to help support and protect this young women, it was much harder for temptation to get in. Then she had everyone go down and she put her arm around me again and talked and I have no idea what she said. Until she asked me how I felt in the circle. Then she said "and I know you're one of the strong one's because you have that sparkle in your eye." And she side hugged me and said thank you.

Uh, pretty dang cool!

I've never met a General Authority of our church before, not too mention have ever been that close in proximity to one. It was a pretty neat experience! Something I will definitely never forget.

It was a really spectacular meeting and I learned alot about myself, about the Young Women organization, and about my responsibilities as a leader. I am so grateful I was able to attend!

Inspiration

Sometimes when I feel like I've hit a rock wall and can't seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel, the Lord reminds me that He is in control, and that He hasn't forgotten me.

Tonight I heard one of the most incredible and inspiring talks I've heard in a long time. It was at the Relief Society General Broadcast. If you don't know what I'm talking about, jump on over here  or here and you can check it out. Basically, it's a night that women in our church come together to be inspired by some of our leaders.

Tonight did not disappoint.

Elder Uchtdorf gave an amazing talk about forget-me-not flowers. He outlined 5 things we should remember as women, 5 things for the 5 petals of the flower.

1. Forget not to be patient with yourself. God is aware that you are not perfect, and also that those you think are perfect are not perfect. Be grateful for small successes.

2. Forget not the difference of a good sacrifice and a poor sacrifice. Am I committing my time and energy to the things that matter most?

3. Forget not to be happy now. Enjoy the simplicity of the candy bar and stop searching for the golden ticket (willy wonka). Don't put happiness on hold to wait for something to appear in the future. Enjoy the blessings you have now. Discover and treasure the beauty of everyday moments.

4. Forget not the "why" of the gospel. Don't focus on the to-do list. The eternal fire of the gospel is the "why."

5. Forget not that the Lord loves you. God has not forgotten you. In your deepest, darkest moments, the Lord loves you and has not forgotten you. You are known and remembered by the most majestic being of the universe. 

Pretty amazing. I can't wait for the talk to be printed and posed so I can have it and read it over and over. I think every woman who was listening felt like that talk was for them. I know it was for me. I know I needed it right not. Especially being happy now and remembering that God loves me and has not forgotten me. 

It also helped that I have some really amazing friends. I have felt so loved, remembered, valued, and cared about here by my friends. I feel like I can talk to other women and they know what I'm going through and have had similar experiences. I feel like I'm not alone. It's really amazing. And I'm very grateful. 

And of course it helps to have an amazing husband and the most adorable baby. Who has discovered how to pull himself up to standing in his crib, has discovered our dvd tower and how it can be pulled down, and who has discovered how to crawl. Everywhere. And follow me around. It's so cute.