General Updates

So remember how I wrote about the Night Time Escapee? Well, I'm happy to say we've finally gotten things a bit more under control! After several frustrating days of nothing working, I decided to give the "Super Nanny" thing a try. This is how we did it, with naps and bed.
Sleep time 1- I sat right next to his bed and didn't say a word while he fell asleep.
Sleep time 2-I moved a couple feet closer to the door and did the same thing.
Sleep time 3-I  moved right next to the door and did the same thing.
Sleep time 4- I moved outside the door and left the door open pretty wide. I reminded him I was there and then was quiet.
Sleep time 5- I closed the door a little more and stayed outside of it.
Sleep time 6-I closed the door almost all the way and reminded him I was right there.

He is now staying in his bed to sleep! For the bulk of the night/nap. Usually he'll wake up at some point in the wee morning hours, cry for a couple minutes, and run to the door. We started closing the door and locking it when we go to bed, so he can't get out. We've had a couple mornings of crying for 10-20 minutes, but then he falls asleep again. It's way better than him sleeping on the floor the entire night!

Naps are still a little tricky. He stays in his bed the whole time, but since we took the binky away, when he wakes up after an hour or 1.5 hours, he freaks out and then cries until I get him. He's always taken a 3 hour nap (or longer), and I think he still needs it, so I've been letting him cry in his room until the 3 hours are up. Hopefully things will improve as time goes on. He's been completely binkyless for a week!

Yeah, I know it's washed out, the flash on my camera is 1,000 times too bright.

But we were watching Lorax and eating popcorn and he was just dang cute.

So how am I doing?

Well, after 4 weeks of battling a cold, I'm finally feeling better. Today marks week 5 since all of this started. I was pretty miserable the first week, then felt a little better, then got much worse, then I got an amazing Priesthood blessing from my husband.

As soon as he finished the blessing, I felt an immediate change. A couple of the things that he said were: "Heavenly Father has been waiting for you to come and ask for a blessing." and then the most profound and powerful experience I've had, "Be healed." I knew that I had done all I knew how to do to help my body fight the sickness and overcome. I had finally gotten to the point that I needed Divine Intervention to help with the rest. I know that Priesthood blessings come directly from God and that my husband is just a mouthpiece. I also have a firm testimony that when we strive to do all we can, then turn to the Lord and ask for help, He will make up the difference.

I felt an immediate change after the blessing, but it still took several days for my body to completely recover. I feel almost 100% me again and have seen the progress my body has made in eradicating the sickness. I am so grateful!!!!

As far as the pregnancy, since people keep asking, the second trimester for me is a piece of cake. It was with Bubs and it's the same with this little guy. I'm never sick, I'm not super tired, I have lots of energy, I feel happy, and I can function completely normal. I feel very blessed that pregnancy is so easy for me, the majority of the time, and when it's tougher it's definitely not manageable.

I'm still working on the emotional joys and excitement of being pregnant and seeing my body change, but each day is getting better. I'm trying to focus on what a miracle it is and how beautiful and wonderful of a blessing I have to carry a child and bring a Spirit into the world and into our family.

I had a dream last night I had to get a c-section because my doctor wasn't there and the other doctor was impatient and wanted the baby out. I woke up a little anxious and I'm feeling more anxious about preparing for the actual labor and delivery part. Ugh.

Anyway, I now hear my sweet munchkin playing with the dog in his room. It hasn't been as long of a nap as I would've liked, but he's not crying, so that's something to be happy about.

Gift from the Retail Gods

So we all know pregnancy is hard. For everyone. In their own special way.
For me, this time around, gaining weight and getting bigger is hard. Very, very, excruciatingly hard.
More on that someday later.
Now that I'm 23 weeks along, I'm suddenly not fitting into my normal clothes as well.
Especially my jeans.
I tossed my skinny jeans about 3 weeks ago and I've been squeezing into my other jeans, sans buttoned button, only for special occasions. Otherwise, it's yoga pants, leggings, or sweatpants. Every day.
My maternity jeans are still uncomfortably big, so I'm stuck in this weird, awkward, uncute feeling stage of life.

Thus, I decided to go shopping.
Since our budget is minimal, (I was using Christmas money), I always hit up Marshall's and Ross before the mall. Usually one is better than the other and for me it's usually Marshall's.
On this particular day, I browsed around for a minute before coming to a random rack placed in a random area that contained random clothes in random sizes.
Right on the end a beautiful, long, dark grey, maxi skirt caught my eye.
Of course I grabbed it, I've been dying for one.
It happened to be the softest material I've felt in awhile and it was also Express brand. I thought for sure it'd be over $10, if not closer to $20.
Imagine my surprise when I found the tag that said "$5.99". Into my cart that went.

I meandered about keeping my eyes open for anything else that looked cute and fun and right as I rounded a corner, something definitely caught my eye!
The exact faux leather jacket I have been pining for since October!!!!
I found it in the mall before we took family pictures and couldn't find my size. I decided to search around to locate my size, but after Black Friday, it suddenly went missing. And by it, I mean all of them. Everywhere. So I waited. And waited. And waited. Then I decided I would probably never find my perfect jacket again and I would just have to ooh and ahh at everyone else who had a cute leather jacket.
Imagine my surprise again when they had several in my size! Into my cart one of those went.

I kept looking around thinking maybe I ought to try on some jeans just for kicks. However, they had no maternity section and I was a little unsure about what size to try and if I would actually find something that worked.
I found a relatively cute pair of boot cuts in the juniors section.
Then I thought "women's sizes are usually a little more curvy, maybe I should look there?"
So I did.
After one glance through a bunch of too-high-waisted skinnies, I almost gave up.
On my way to the dressing room I checked the other side of the rack just to make sure and out popped a super, duper, ridiculously cute pair of skinnies. In a size 6. In a sweet brand. With a great price.
I grabbed them and headed to try stuff on.

Now, when I say the following has never happened, believe when I say: "THIS NEVER HAPPENS!!!"

I slid on the skirt. Perfect fit.
I slid on the jeans. Perfect fit. 
1 pair of jeans. 1st pair I tried on. Perfect fit. Pregnant. Non-pregnant jeans.
THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN.

Even when I'm not pregnant and at an ideal body shape, it takes me about 25-50 pairs of jeans before I can find one that sorta, kinda, feels almost right. (just ask my hubby, he'll agree)

Of course I bought all three items with a huge grin on my face wondering how in the heck I got so lucky.
One of my most successful shopping trips of all time.
I fully believe that when you're pregnant, if you dress cute, you'll feel cute and it will lessen the blow of feeling huge and pregnant.
So now I feel a little more cute and a little less huge and pregnant.

Although, after a week or two of craving, and satisfying those cravings, of chocolate, sugar, treats, late night snacks, potato chips, and pizza, I decided this week to start:

"Tracking my food so I consume the appropriate amount of calories in a day versus consuming about 4,000 calories a day"

*which probably actually happened...on the night we had a normal, good, healthy, dinner and then had fries, frosty's, and a JBC at 9:00 pm. Oy. Did I mention the Wendy's 2,000 feet from our door opened? Not good.

I know I shouldn't be concerned about dieting and losing weight while I'm pregnant, and I'm not. But I should be concerned about what foods, and amounts of food, I put into my body, which I'm trying to do. The healthier I am pregnant, the easier it'll be to bounce back! Right?
Now if only I could find some motivation to exercise...oh wait, it's 19 degrees outside.

Happy Monday and thank the Retail Gods for a little wardrobe update!

It's all just Stuff, right?

Sometimes things go wrong. Like...

...Bubs forgot how to sleep through the night.
...he also learned how to remove the child lock on his door in about 2 seconds.
...he also thinks it's hilarious to do exactly what I've just told him not to do.
...he also thinks it's fun to throw his food off the table, along with his cup, plate, bowl, and anything else in sight.
...he also thinks it's fun to spoon feed the dog.
...he also thinks it's fun to throw tantrums and make everything dramatic.
...he also thinks it's fun to only nap for an hour.
...he also thinks it's fun to wake up at 5:15 am and wander into mom and dad's room.

and biggest of all...
...he thinks it's fun to dump his sippy cup full of water all over our couch and laptop while he was watching Cars, on the laptop.

It was a really fun morning.
I'm not really sure if our laptop will survive.

*we do have a desktop computer, but every  picture and file we've ever written is on the laptop.

Maybe we can salvage the hard drive?

Sometimes things get better. Like...

...eating oreos and peanut butter.
...being surprised by your husband leaving class early to help solve the laptop crisis.
...reading a book while ignoring the crying it out because you know he can't escape since the door now locks from the outside.
...putting on sweatpants after deciding they sound far more comfortable than trying to stay squeezed into normal sized "cute" jeans.


Today is one of those days that I'm glad a day is only a day and lasts for 24 hours.

...I promise my life is not tragic and dramatic every day. We seem to be experiencing a particularly difficult week from our dear sweet toddler.

What do you write when you don't know what to write?

I've been sick for 3 weeks now. When will it go away?

I finally decided to write a cookbook. Nothing big. Nothing major. Mostly just for me so I can have all my favorite recipes in one central location. I may feel kind and share if others are interested.

Bubs got his MMR shot today. I really hate shots. I think they're important but scary. We only gave him the dTap, the polio, and the MMR. None of the other ones. And those were administered over a span of 18 months, starting when he was 6 months old. It worked for us. I know it doesn't work for others. I also know it's controversial and extremely personal.

I want to blog, I really do, but every time I think about writing something, I only think about one major thing that's been on my mind. I don't know if I want to share yet because it feels personal. It makes me feel vulnerable to write it. I'm afraid of sounding whiny. I don't want people to tell me the same things everyone else have told me and the same things I already know. But I know I'm not alone. And sometimes it's therapeutic to write things. So maybe I'll start, write, re-write, re-write, re-write, and eventually finish the post some day. Then maybe I'll find the guts to share.

Until that day, something exciting happened here over the weekend....

YES! It's a piano!

YES! It's residing in our apartment!

YES! 4 guys moved it up 2 flights of stairs!

YES! It was free!

YES! All of my married sisters and I officially have pianos!

YES! I'm SO excited!

YES! Bubs loves it!

YES! Scott has played it more than I have.

YES! I play(ed) piano. I was amazing until I quit at age 14. Now I'm dying to pick it up again. 

Thank you, Dad, for spotting it on the curb one day and generously donating it after you acquired something far better!

Thank you, Mom, for driving 250 miles with an extra couple hundred pounds in the back so I didn't have to rent a van!

Life is busy, crazy, and oh so happy. I'm also craving candy. 

The end.

Night Escapee Escapades

Our baby is turning 2 in four days!!!!

How on earth did that happen? How did time go so fast? I'm too young to have a two year old!

....not too mention number 2 on the way....

So what is this trouble maker up to lately? 

Trouble.

With sleeping, that is.

He has perfected the art of departing his crib in 0.003 seconds flat after the door is closed and the last "goodnight, love you!" is whispered. 

From there he runs to the door, screams, cries, bangs, jiggles the knob, sometimes removes the child lock (aren't those supposed to be "child proof?")  and then falls asleep on the floor. 

This happens every single time we put him to bed. Regardless of nap time or night time. Night light or pitch black. Thirty minutes of books and songs or five minutes. Bath or no bath. Big dinner or little dinner. 

We even removed the front piece of his crib so he could climb in bed easier and feel like a big boy. 

Now he climbs out in 0.001 second flat.

Sometimes we let him sleep on the floor until we go to bed, and then we quietly move him. More often than not, he wakes up right as we're shutting the door. Cue crying, running, and sleeping on the floor again. Sometimes Scott sleeps on the floor to ensure no crib escaping. It works until he gets up to leave.

We're both a little frustrated. A little annoyed. A little tired. 

I've come to the conclusion that: is it really that bad to let my toddler sleep on the floor???

I'm sure he'll grow out of it one day....

*side note: this all started happening after we came home from an almost 3 week long trip to Utah.

Aside from these super fun escaping escapades, he really is developing quite the personality.

Tantrums in Costco.

Waking up at 5:50 am.

Squawking "water! water! water!" or "binkeeee! binkeeee! binkeeee!" in desperation whenever he needs it. You'd think he was having a panic attack. We're working on the "please, mama." But he still needs "what do you say?" first.

...maybe it's just been one of those days.

Because he really is very sweet, and hilarious. He is incredibly obedient when we ask for his help and he cleans up his toys like a boss.  He loves "helping" me cook, wash dishes, unload the dishwasher, do the laundry, vacuum, etc. His favorite show is Curious George, which I don't mind because I think it's super cute. For now. He loves giving kisses. He also loves people! When we go to a party or get together, he'll usually find one person and become obsessed with them. It's pretty funny. He has no fear of strangers. Or dogs. 

He is a serious talker and starting to put sentences together. Of course, Scott and I have to interpret for others sometimes, but he's pretty easy to understand. He also totally understands the concept of "do this, and you get a reward!" For example, apparently in Nursery they give out marshmallows for standing against the wall. This morning I got the marshmallows out for hot chocolate, and immediately he went to the wall and said "Stand wall. Marshmallow." Cute, funny, and sad at the same time. 

Okay I'll stop boring you with how awesome our son is. 

But if you have any suggestions for the whole sleeping issue, let me know! Otherwise, the floor it is.

Here comes another BOY!

Christmas was fabulous.
Scott's parents, sister, and sister with her family came to visit.
We hung out, made gingerbread houses, toured the Science Center, drove around Forest Park, ate food, talked, saw the train exhibit at the Botanical Gardens, shopped, opened presents, and enjoyed each others company.
Of course, right before everyone came, Bubs got sick along with his cousins who live here. The day after everyone arrived, I got sick too. So it was lots of going and playing and trying to act like I was feeling alright, which I was, sometimes.
Then the day after everyone left, I started feeling much better. At least it didn't last long! (I attribute it to chiropractic care, downing vitamin C, taking calcium, sipping apple cider vinegar, eating 4 grapefruit, not eating treats, chugging water, and trying to rest)

The most exciting part about this past week? We found out we're having another BOY!!!

I'm 20 weeks along now. I've been feeling great for about 5 weeks. The first 15 weeks I was more tired than I've ever been in my life and nauseous all the time. I only threw up 2-3 times, which isn't bad, so I consider myself lucky. Now I'm feeling wonderful, as I did in the 2nd Tri with Bubs, but I'm still fighting the mental battle. I started feeling the baby around 15 weeks and now I feel him all the freakin' time! I don't think he ever stops moving.

I'm really excited to have another boy. Although there are some things I'm a little distraught about, it's nothing to worry about right now. I love having a boy and I have had so much fun with Bubs! He will absolutely love having a brother to play with (and so will I!). I'm also grateful it's a boy because it will be so much easier financially: we already have tons of boy clothes, along with all of our other baby stuff, and toys. Plus, I don't know that Scott could restrain himself from spoiling a baby girl, so it's better to start with boys when we have no money!

I also feel confident that I can raise boys well. I feel like we've done an amazing job with Bubs, though we still have a long way to go, and although every child is different it'll be easier raising two boys than switching to girl mode. Though I will admit, I really want a girl for our third, whenever that happens!!!

It's taken me quite awhile to be really excited about this pregnancy, but now I can honestly say that I'm thrilled and SO excited to have another baby!

I found this little gem while searching through pictures to put on our walls. I just love both of their faces!
Yes, Bubs was about 7 months old and yes, they are going down a water slide.
Another reason I love my BOYS!!!!!

But it's just violence...

How many times have you heard the phrase "but it's just violence..." in regards to a movie, tv show, or video game rating?
Perhaps more commonly, "well, it's only rated that for the violence. Violence doesn't bother me. It's the sexual content I avoid." 

I hear it all the time.
In fact, I've said it in one form or another.

Is that statement really true, though? "It's just violence. Violence doesn't bother or affect me."
I argue that it is completely false. Nobody is immune to the violence in movies, tv shows, and video games, especially video games. Our Spirits and brains are not immune to violence. Not one bit. The "immunity" that may occur for one is actually a numbing of the brain's response and reaction to repeated stimulus.

As a member of the LDS church, I believe in the Holy Ghost. I believe that I was given the gift of the Holy Ghost as a means of protection and guide when I am need. Anything that is not virtuous, lovely, of good report, or praiseworthy, can drive away the Spirit. Violence is part of that category. I believe the more violence we watch and participate in, the quicker the Spirit leaves until it eventually completely withdraws.

I, like so many others, cannot stop thinking about the horrific tragedy that occurred last week at Sandy Hook Elementary. Nobody will forget it. Our children will read about it in their History books. It was a terrible, horrible, absolutely heart wrenching tragedy. The more I've read on the matter and the more I think about it, I can't help but think "what could have been done to prevent this? How can we prevent it from happening again?"

I've come up with some of my own conclusions.

1. The Government could take away guns from everyone and/or make tighter gun control laws. This isn't possible, or a good idea, because it won't do a dang thing. Crazy people will still get their hands on guns, and the good guys will be left unarmed. And yet another gun control law will not stop someone who is intent on getting a weapon and using it for the wrong reasons.

2. The Government could give everyone guns. Obviously this wouldn't work because it would make it even easier for the crazy people to have access to guns and there would be a whole slew of problems that would come as a result. Not a solution.

3. The Government could eradicate any and all violence from the media. This is completely impossible because there is just so much. There would be no way to remove every violent thing from every house, movie theater, production, stage set, video game, youtube, etc. It's impossible. Not only that, it also completely takes away our agency. Which, by the way, is Satan's plan.

4. Teach in the homes. Educate your children. Educate your family. Teach your children good morals and the difference between right and wrong. Parent. Discipline. Monitor the things your children participate in and are involved with. This was the best solution I could come up with. However, the people who are not likely to go on a shooting rampage are already doing this. The people who might, may already be doing this. The people who should be doing this may be uneducated, in poverty, and unable to teach in the home. And of course, no matter how much a parent teaches their child, they are still free to make their own decisions and choices. Which means, that even from the best of homes with the best of families with obedient children, someone could still be persuaded by Satan to do something unthinkable. Which brings me to my final conclusion:

This type of tragedy cannot be 100% prevented. 


Of course, there are many things that can be done to improve on safety, including allowing teachers to conceal and carry, providing schools with an armed officer, practicing more lock down drills, and the list goes on.

The point I want to make, and the overwhelming feelings I have experienced on the matter are such:

-I have a huge responsibility to educate my children on what is right and wrong.
-I have a huge responsibility of making our home a safe haven from outside influences.
-I have a huge responsibility of making sure the media that enters our home is appropriate and does not drive away the Spirit.
-I need to make a resolve to better screen the media we consume. I need to be more careful about things we watch, rent, and buy. I need to scrutinize the video games we play.

Satan has taken hold of the media in our world with an iron fist. He has twisted and turned every good thing into something inappropriate. It has not happened in one, big, lightning bolt occurrence, but little by little. He has made it seem popular, cool, and fun, to watch shows and movies that glorify killing innocent and non innocent characters. He has made it appear popular, cool, and fun, to play video games that celebrate "110 kills! Congratulations!" 

I believe our society has been so dumbed down by violent tv shows, movies, games, and more, that the line of difference between virtually killing and killing in reality has become very thin and grey.

This is devastating. And scary.

In closing, my husband said something to me that I had never considered. He said that no sane person in their right mind would go into a school and kill 20, innocent, six and seven year old children. The person who did this was possessed by an evil spirit. Just like Christ cast the evil spirits out of the person and into the pigs that jumped off the cliff. This person was possessed and taken over by an evil spirit of Satan and he proceeded to do the work of the Devil. When that work was finished, Satan abandoned him and caused him to turn the gun on himself and take his own life.

God will never abandon you.

I hope that I can be a better wife, mother, and individual, and make a better effort at examining the media that I consume and bring into our home. It's not "just violence" and it's not okay. I can't change the world or the people in it, but I can do my best to make my home a haven safe from the outside influences.

That is all.